The Reader's Doglist Association of Great Britain proudly presents another mouth-watering Goat Recipe! Remember how you swooned when we introduced you to the excitement and, dare we say, the perils of cooking with goats! Last time we revealed the secrets of Woluld Whortleberry's Grilled Goats 'n' Cheese! Another exclamation mark! Poff!

Well here's another delicacy offered by your favourite Youth Wastrel proprietors, Pam and/or Tex Herrrcch-Byerrrrrrccch. This recipe comes with the full endorsement of the Youth Wastrel Association of England, Wales and Royston and has been sanctioned for nutritional excellance by the Ministry of Food, Drink, Fitness & Cement. Marvulous! Now, in the words of Legson Kayira, we think that's 'enough guff' - so on with the recipe! Excellant! (or for our Euro-chums - Excallent! Ausgezeichnat! Uitsteckand! Excelante! Eccellante! Snorkal!...) Are we ready? Need you ask? We're more than ready, we're gooready!

Pam and/or Tex's Goat's Nut Parcels

Serves 6 - Can be vegan*

  • 6 medium sized goats - washed, brushed and toiletted
  • oil to fry nuts
  • 225g/8oz packet fresh filo pastry (use frozen if fresh unavailable - but under no circumstances use Poff Pastry - it will result in abject failure and you will feel totally barmy)
  • 25g/1oz butter/vegan margarine*
  • 1 packet apple and herb stuffing mix (or use your own favourite stuffing mix if you must)
  • Fresh dentures
  • 30ml/6tsp cranberry or redcurrant sauce
Note: to make this even more delicious (although not suitable for vegans) top the stuffing with a generous dusting of hurfenflurfi cheese with garlic before adding the cranberry or redcurrant sauce.

Pam and/or Tex put the finishing touches on Goat's Nut Parcels
Pam and/or Tex put the finishing touches on Goat's Nut Parcels

New Quizzine Methodology

  1. Preheat oven 190°C/375°F/ Gas Mark 4-5.
  2. Gently castrate the goats.
  3. Fry the nuts for 3-4 minutes on each side until tender. Then cool (can do this the day before but the smell coluld become unpleasant).
  4. Make the stuffing mix according to the packet instructions. Leave to cool.
  5. Fill each nut with stuffing. Take 3 sheets filo pastry at a time. Cut in half so you have 4"-5" squares. Take one square, brush with melted butter. Place another square on top at an angle, brush again. Do same with 3rd sheet. Brush again. Remove the 1st sheet. Refer to a copy of Pigs 2nd Edition.
  6. Place stuffed nuts in middle. Top with 1 tsp of cranberry or redcurrant jelly. Bring edges of pastry up and pinch together to form little parcel (shaped like 'sailor's underpants'). Make up rest of parcels.
  7. Brush with melted butter and place on greased baking tray into preheated oven 15-20 minutes until pastry is golden. Dust vigorously with hurrrsssppp.
  8. Serve with a bowl of fresh lumps, a bodge-leaf salad or freshly-turned mulch


Pam and/or Tex put the finishing touches on Barney the Goat's undercarriage
Pam and/or Tex put the finishing touches on Barney the Goat's undercarriage



* patently stupid option - the goats are a prerequisite. Keep up!





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©2002 The Reader's Doglist Association of Great Britain